


A Tale of a Bedridden Strider

by parasolghost



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Character Sickness, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-08
Updated: 2012-12-08
Packaged: 2017-11-20 14:43:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/586501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parasolghost/pseuds/parasolghost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave thinks being sick is boring as hell. He could be doing anything: working on some sick rhymes, talking to his friends, just anything. But perhaps this mentality is a bit premature...</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Tale of a Bedridden Strider

**Author's Note:**

  * For [haynerscornershoppe](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=haynerscornershoppe).



            Dave has experienced a lot of shit in his life-from being pushed around by the people in school to having his Bro sic Cal on him on various occasions to dropping a hammer on his toe to getting a paper cut (during which he had actually teared up). Yet he’s never actually been really bothered or upset with them. However, over the past week, he had to come to a very simple conclusion: being sick was probably the shittiest thing in the history of shit.

            At first, he didn’t mind it as much, since staying at home from school allowed him time to think of some sick rhymes and draw his shitty comics all day. However, as his condition worsened, he was reduced to lying in his bed and watching TV, barely able to flip through channels as Bro prodded him with a thermometer and surround him with smuppets, despite Dave’s protests and feeble arm-flailing. So, as of now, Dave was just stuck watching some Spanish soap opera while buried from the neck down in his brother’s creepy puppets.

            Dave groaned and rolled over onto his back, displacing some smuppets that plopped gently onto his bedroom floor. He was bored as fuck and everything sucked at this point. He could be doing anything right now like talking to his friends or working on that song he was supposed to write for Jade for her birthday, which seemed to be lurking just around the corner (followed closely by his and Rose’s birthdays). Dave was especially worried about these stupid lyrics: he probably scrapped his lyrics over twenty times and ended up tearing out tufts of hair in frustration as he watched his cool rhymes become lame-as-hell Shakespearean sonnets about his unrequited feelings for Jade. He had become so desperate that he had even looked to John for advice who told Dave that he had no talent in the art of rapping and not to bother with his awkward method of courting, to which Dave told John to eat a dick before stubbornly starting another terrible line of prose. The latest of which, and possibly the best of the entire collection was just sitting on the nightstand next to his bed, from when he was working on it a few days ago.

            Although, at this point, maybe he could even deal with listening to John’s snarky comments about his rapping and Rose’s lengthy advice on how to woo the charming Lady Harley. Just anyone to talk to other than his Bro, who keeps going on and on about how "You're a Strider, lil man, and Striders never get sick,"

            That's a whole load of bullcrap because Bro gets sick all the time and Dave has to look after him.

            Actually, speak of the devil...

            "Hey, little bro are you still coughing your lungs out?" Dave's bedroom door swung open and Bro walked in dressed in a frilly apron that read "Kiss the Cook", carrying a tray of soup and some nasty grape medicine, a shopping list tucked between his fingers. "Should I get the anal probe?"

            "Fuck off, Bro," Dave groaned feebly.

            "Whoa there, Grouch, I just came to tell you that I'm gonna be gone for a bit," Bro set down the tray on the nightstand. "You can take care of yourself, right? I'll only be gone for a few hours..."

            "Yeah, yeah. Just go already," Dave pulled his covers over his head, brooding over his terrible luck, as his Bro loudly rustled through the apartment for his car keys before stomping to the door.

            "Well, hey there, Ms. Harley."

            Dave stirred in confusion. What the heck could his brother be talking about? How could Jade be-

            "Hi, Mr. Bro Strider, sir!"

            Oh shit, it's actually her. He wouldn't miss that adorable voice anywhere. Why was she here?

            "I came to check on Dave! Is he okay?"

            "Oh yeah, you know, he's just coughing his lungs out and shitting grape medicine every two hours, nothing big."

            Dave was so going to kill his Bro the next time he's well enough to strife.

            "Actually," Bro continued, "I was just about leave to get some stuff done."

            "Oh, are you sure you should be leaving him while he's sick?" Jade asked worriedly. Dave felt a heat rise in his cheeks at the prospect of Jade being worried about him. Don't get your hopes up, Dave. She's just a friend.

            "If you want, you could look after him for me while I'm gone."

            Oh man he's going to kill Bro.

            "HEY, LIL MAN, YOU'RE GIRLFRIEND'S HERE!"

            "She's not my..." Dave choked as he tried to deny the comment. his face flushed.

            Dave tuned out their conversation as he mentally screamed and pulled the covers over his head. What if Jade walks in and sees all the lame poetry he wrote her? What if he passes gas and she gets grossed out? What if he falls asleep and starts calling her name in her sleep? This could possibly be the end of any chance he ever had with Jade (and he had a feeling those chances were tiny in the first place).

            While Dave was contemplating his possibilities for utter and complete embarassment and failure, his bedroom door suddenly creaked open and a head of long, black hair and big green eyes peeked into his room

            "Hi, Dave!"

            "Hey, Harley," Dave tried to say with as much enthusiasm as possible. He tried to lift himself a bit to look at her, but he was suddenly quickly pushed back down by a pair of small hands.

            "Don't get up! You need to rest yourself as much as possible!"

            Dave's body temperature jumped up even higher than it already was as he looked into Jade's eyes, her nose just inches from his as she made sure he was no longer trying to get up.

            Dave froze as her fingers traced his shoulder blades and went up his neck, her digits moving up to his forehead.

            "Goodness, Dave you're burning up!" Jade exclaimed. "If I knew you were this sick, I would've checked up on you sooner!" Jade removed her hands from Dave's person, much to his mixed relief and disappointment.

            "Well, I wouldn't want you to worry, Harley," Dave chuckled feebly.

            "Dave, nothing, is more important to me than your wellbeing," Jade said firmly, "Besides, where would I be if my cool kid isn't feeling so cool?"

            Jade reached up and rearranged Dave's pillows again, batting some of the smuppets away. She then made a motion to remove Dave's shades (which he still wore even in his sleep) and he flinched. Jade stopped and drew her hands back sheepishly, muttering an apology.

            Dave suddenly felt a pang of guilt. This girl was one of his best friends and who he felt was the coolest girl out there and he wouldn't even let her see his own mutated eyes. C'mon Dave, how pathetic can you get?

            "Jade, could you take off my shades for me?" he asked.

            Jade smiled and raised her hands to his face. Her fingers skimmed his face a bit as she pulled off the sunglasses and looked into his red eyes. She reached up again to brush his bangs away and smile.

            "Dave, you have such pretty eyes," Jade giggled. "I wish you would take off your glasses more often."

            "Well, I wouldn't be the cool kid I am without them would I?"

            "Oh yeah, how could I forget," Jade faked a swoon. "You're too cool Dave, I can't even handle how cool you are."

            Dave smiled as Jade placed his shades on the nightstand. He really couldn't handle how much she fed his "coolkid ego" even though he knew and she knew that he was just a huge dork. He loved the way she seemed to care for everyone around her so much and how her long, black hair swished back and forth as she walked and how her beautiful green eyes widened when he talked to her. And God, he loved the way she felt when she gave her a friendly hug, although he did wonder what it would be like to have her in an embrace, her legs wrapped around his waist, their lips meeting, his hand stroking her long hair, and her hand-

            "Dave, you haven't eaten yet?" Jade asked, snatching Dave away from his delusional fantasies. Dave's eyes darted to the tray on his nightstand.

            "Well, I can barely change the channel," Dave said, nodding his head at the TV, which still showed whatever Spanish soap opera was on. "It'd be pretty difficult for me to eat."

            "Well, I guess that's what I'm here for!" Jade said cheerfully. She sat down on his bed, soup and spoon in hand. "C'mon cool kid, here comes the choo-choo train."

            Dave laughed as Jade made train noises and inched a spoonful of soup closer to his lips. This continued until the soup bowl was empty, with Dave and Jade both taking turns making different sounds ranging from airplane to cars to motorcycles to dogs ("Dave!" Jade said with a pout.)

            "Oh, I think we spilled some on you," Jade said, raising her hand to his cheek and wiping a drop of soup from the corner of his lip. Suddenly, they both went silent as Jade's hand cupped Dave's cheek for a while longer than normal.

            Dave soon found himself, once again, drowning in Jade's eyes, which had an unreadable expression. He could imagine that his was completely different from hers and then he began to panic a bit. Jade was always a great reader of expressions and Dave always wore his shades because his eyes were too expressive for his own good.

            He could only imagine how much longing he felt for her right now. How much he wanted lift his head and kiss her right then and there, only to probably be rejected before he could say a word. It's a wonder why he even bothered trying to write a song for Jade when he knew how badly he was gonna be rejected. He always told himself that he'd be ready for it when it happened, but her birthday is in a week: if he couldn't handle rejection now, how would he handle it on her birthday?

            "I'll go wash these for you," Jade suddenly said. Dave shoved away his worries and soon found himself very disappointed that Jade was no longer just a few inches away from him and was, instead, navigating her way through the many smuppets that littered his bedroom (and actually the rest of the apartment, tray balanced in one hand.

            And with this, Dave suddenly had enough time to think to himself again, except now his thoughts were flooded with Jade. He sighed as he reached over and pressed the TV remote's off button. His eyes trailed to the now empty nightstand and with a start, he realized that his lyrics were no longer on the table. His heart seemed to stop right at that moment as he panicked. Where the fuck did it go? Did Jade accidentally take it with her when she got the tray? She could be reading it right this moment. She could be wincing at Dave's terrible attempts to be romantic and at the prospect of dating a huge loser like him. Is this how it's going to end? Oh man, he just could not deal with this right now.

            Dave's thoughts were interrupted for the umpteenth time that day by a shrill scream that was followed by a loud thump and a shattering of glass. Dave threw the covers off of himself and used all the energy he could muster (not much) to rush out the bedroom door. He arrived in the ktchen to see Jade sitting on the floor.

            "Jade," Dave panicked and kneeled next to her. With this sudden stop in motion, all of his previous panicked energy escaped him. "Are you okay? What happened?" Dave reached out to take her hand, but then pulled back.

            "Hush, Dave, I'm fine," Jade got up on her own. "I just slipped on your brother's smuppet, but..." Jade's gaze wandered to a spot next to her. Dave followed her gaze to see the bowl broken in to several large pieces. "Gosh, I'm so sorry." A look of guilt spread over Jade's face and she knelt down again to pick up the fragments.

            Dave reached out and grabbed her arm. "It's alright, I'll deal with it later," Dave sighed. "I'm just glad you're okay."

            "Gosh, Dave, it was only a little slip, you're exaggerating," Jade laughed. Her expression suddenly became stern, "But what are _you_ doing out of bed, mister? You're supposed to be resting!"

            "I wanted to make sure you're okay!" Dave objected. However before he knew it, he was scooped up in Jade's armed and suddenly he felt embarrassed. Jade was always known in his small group of friends to be very strong. Dave couldn't even lift her like this (so much for trying to be a charming prince). "Jade, I can walk just fine on my own," Dave said.

            "Shut up, Dave, I'm being helpful!" Jade said sternly as she transported him from the kitchen back to his bed, Dave completely embarrassed the entire time. Jade tucked him back into bed. "Now don't move another muscle, buster!" Jade scolded.

            "Alright, alright," Dave sighed. Honestly, couldn't Dave be concerned for Jade for just a second? She has always been a stubborn girl, never telling anyone what was on her mind when she was upset or feeling unwell, and then scolding the others for giving her too much attention.

            "Good," Jade said triumphantly. "But goodness, your appartment is covered in these things! I mean, look at all these-" Jade stopped as her eye seemed to catch something. She bent over and grabbed a sheet of paper and Dave's heart dropped right at that moment. He watched as Jade's eyes glanced at the paper. Nothing showed in her face, no reaction no nothing.

            "I think you dropped this," Jade said, setting the paper on the table.

            Are you kidding? All that work and worry and she is indifferent towards his feelings? She could been disgusted, or happy, or confused, but instead she was _indifferent_. And this probably hurt Dave the most.

            Jade took a seat on the edge of Dave's bed. "So, Dave, what do sick people do after they eat? Do you just lie there all day staring at the ceiling? Should I take your temperature again? Do you want some water?"

            "I don't need anything," Dave snapped, a bit angry with Jade's reaction.

            Jade flinched at Dave's sudden burst of anger and Dave felt a bit guilty (but not that guilty). Dave was never brisk with her.

            "Dave, is something wrong?" Jade asked in confusion.

            "Of course, there's something wrong," Dave sighed. "I'm sorry I snapped at you, Jade. I just..."

            "Just what?"

            "Jade, you read that paper and you have absolutely _nothing_ to say about it?" Dave frowned at her in frustration. "I wrote an entire sappy poem that was _supposed_ to be a fucking song, but you don't give a shit about how I feel."

            "Dave, I don't know what-"

            "Look, Jade," Dave took a deep breath, not letting her continue while he was on a roll here. Shit, here's where it all goes down. He's sick and high on flu medication and now he's going to ruin his friendship with Jade forever.

            "I love you, Jade," Dave felt his face flush as he uttered these words. "I love you more than I love a sister, okay? You're the coolest girl I've ever met and _God_ sometimes you make me go crazy."

            "Dave, I-"

            "Jade Harley, I love you enough to write about twenty different fucking drafts of lyrics for a song about you and the least you can do is reject me and give me some closure. I mean, I know they were really crappy, but-"

            "Dave Strider!" Jade raised her voice, interrupting Dave's tyraid. Before he knew, it, their noses had collided awkwardly before Jade pulled back and tilted her head and slammed her lips into Dave's once again. Her eyes were tightly closed and Dave's were wide open. However, as Jade relaxed a bit, Dave felt himself falling into the same notion. He put his hand to the back of her head, stroking her hair. Dave allowed himself to enjoy the sensation of her soft lips, and found his tongue pushing against her lips, pleading for entry, which she granted.

            Dave flicked his tongue against hers before tracing over her teeth, enjoying every bit of her mouth. Jade let out a little whimper of pleasure as Dave's hand moved down from her hair, glazing over her neck and down until he reached the small of her back. Dave felt himself shudder as he felt Jade's sweet breath on his face as they broke apart.

            "Dave Strider," Jade began breathlessly. "How could you for a minute believe that I wouldn't care about your feelings."

            "Well... I... The lyrics..." Dave said incoherently, still dazed by that glorious kiss.

            "What are you-" Jade looked at him in complete confusion. She snatched the paper from the nightstand and looked over it again. "This is a shopping list."

            "Wait, what?" Jade held the paper for Dave to see.

Shopping List

1\. Butter

2\. Eggs

3\. Milk

4\. Condoms

            Dave mentally punched himself in the face for his stupidity and reminded himself to kill Bro when he got home.

            Jade tossed the paper aside and the two stared awkwardly at each other for a few seconds. Jade began twidling her thumbs and Dave just lay there, in his ecstatic, but still ill as hell, condition.

            "So, uh," Dave began, "does this mean that you..."

            "Yes, Mr. Strider," Jade giggled as Dave lifted himself up a bit so that he was properly sitting. "This means that I love you more than anyone in the whole wide world." And at that point, Jade took his hand and hers and gazed at him with her big green eyes and the most adorable shy grin on her face.

            Jade inched face closer to Dave, ready to initiate another much desired kiss when Dave spoke again.

            "Are you sure you wanna do this again? I mean, you'll get sick, too so-"

            "I don't care," Jade whispered. Dave cupped Jade's face in his hands and brought his lips to hers.

\---

            Dave has experienced a lot of shit in his life-from being told that his raps suck, to enduring hours and hours of Lalonde courting lessons, to being surrounded by hundreds of smuppets while he was sick. Yet, he was never really bothered or upset by these things. In fact, he could even say that these things helped him a lot. Either way, as of today, Dave decided that being sick was probably the best thing that ever happened to him.

**Author's Note:**

> A secret santa gift for Hayner or haynerscornershoppe on tumblr! I must sincerely apologize for the rushed ending: I was entering this a bit past the due date, so I wanted to get it in as soon as possible! Nevertheless, I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
